Controversial Stuff in Mark 10

In Mark 10 we will see Jesus touch on some very “hot topics” in his day and our own. He delves into marriage and sexuality, the proper use of wealth, and the character of church leadership. How do we approach more controversial passages of Jesus? We want to keep in mind that we can safely assume that Jesus only intends the very best for us, no matter what he says or does. Jesus does not approach these topics from a political standpoint. He is not trying to make someone “feel bad” and he isn’t being unkind. If we believe Jesus is the Incarnate Son of God, then we will want to take him seriously, even if it is difficult. We will also keep in mind other passages of Scripture and the Tradition of the Church when we read the Gospels. What we won’t want to do is dismiss sayings of Jesus and their implications simply because the broader culture or we do not hold those “values” any longer. Culture does not determine the truth; in fact, those who follow Jesus are called to influence the culture after the pattern of the Gospel. And, as disciples of Jesus, we do not get to tell Jesus what he should have said or what his word should be today. That would be a pretty wild approach to following Jesus...Keeping all of this mind, read chapter 10 in a posture of faith and allow the reflection questions below to help discussions. 
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 Reflection Question: 
1. What reason does Jesus give for why Moses gave the law about a “bill/certificate of divorce” in the Old Testament (see verse 5)? What might make someone’s heart hard before this revelation of Jesus about marriage and divorce? Read Ephesians 5:32 about husbands and wives; how does Ephesians 5:32 relate to the meaning of marriage in Mark 10:1-9? 
2. A lot of ink has been shed trying to make the camel/needle saying more palatable. The best evidence suggests that Jesus meant a camel as we know it and he meant a needle as we commonly understand a needle, the image is meant to be comical in its absurdity. It is literally impossible to pass a camel through the eye of a needle. After reading verses 17 to 31, how does Jesus help shape our understanding of wealth from God’s perspective? 
3. There’s always a danger lurking below the surface when someone gains a place of authority, whether it’s an officially recognized position or simply a place of influence. People can become so attached to the title or the influence that they forget the purpose behind the position: service. How does Jesus’ rebuke of James and John and his admonition about service challenge you personally?  

 ​Food for Thought: 
 Let’s talk about annulments a little bit after reading Jesus’ statements on marriage and divorce in Mark 10:1-12. If someone’s former marriage bond is annulled that means that a Sacrament did not occur at the time of the exchange of vows. A Sacrament makes visible an invisible reality. For example, in Baptism, the visible water and audible prayers of Baptism signify – make visible – the invisible reality of the cleansing from sin and New Birth. In the Sacrament of Matrimony, both husband and wife constitute the “visible stuff” of the Sacrament of Marriage following their vows. Marriage is meant to make present and signify the love of Christ for the Church. And, so, both man and woman are meant to enter marriage freely, with the intention of remaining faithful until death, giving of oneself in a total way that is not 50/50 but 100%/100%, and open to the gift of rearing of children. Authentic vows mean that both parties understand – to a certain degree – who they’re really marrying and what marriage really entails. 
Baptism in the Catholic Church gives someone both rights and responsibilities. Baptized Catholics do a have a right to marry in the Catholic Church (if they don’t have any impediments, like prior-sacramental-bonds), but they also have the responsibility to follow the commandments and teachings of the Church. For example, Catholics have the responsibility to exchange vows before a priest or deacon, in a church or bishop-designated sacred space, after preparation with a priest or delegated minister, and then live out those vows by a practice of the faith within the home. The Sacrament of Matrimony is, thus, a public Sacrament. Marriage does not rest within the domain of an isolated couple, it involves two families joining together, it will have an impact on those around the couple, on any children reared within that bond, and the relationship will be visible within the life of the parish and broader community. This public dynamic of marriage is why the Church has important teachings about the reception of Communion depending on one’s marital status. One’s marital status is more than an individualist marker; it involves a public witness. This is why it’s both very important and very controversial and requires a merciful and, and yet faithful stance when discussing these matters. With that background in place, we can look at the topic of annulments with a little more clarity.  
There are two types of annulments in the Church.  
One type of annulment is called a “documentary case” and this looks at the responsibilities one has when entering marriage and whether a baptized Catholic fulfilled those minimum responsibilities, e.g. meeting with a priest, married in the Church, etc. If a baptized Catholic marries outside the Catholic Church (without proper permissions) or before a justice of the peace or Elvis in Vegas or within a different denomination or religion (without proper dispensations) and wants an annulment so that she/he can marry within the Catholic Church at a later time, then that person meets with a priest, gets necessary documents that show that the marriage did not remain in keeping with the responsibilities of a baptized Catholic, sends those documents into the Diocesan Tribunal, and awaits the response. All that is needed in the documentary case are the documents and a form that gives some minimal details like the who/what/when/where. In the Diocese of Cleveland these take a couple months. The documents provide evidence that states that a sacramental bond did not occur between the couple. This doesn’t mean a relationship didn’t occur, and it doesn’t mean a legal contract didn’t take place, it means that the necessary ingredients for the Sacrament of Matrimony (as a Sacrament within the Church) did not happen.  
If someone married outside the Church and wants to bring their marriage into the Church as a Sacrament (which I suggest you do if that is the case), please meet with your pastor. If your pastor is rude about your request, find a different priest or deacon. Whenever someone or a couple meet with me about annulments or about bringing a marriage into the Church, I strive to both remain true to the Gospel and the Church while seeking to be understanding and merciful. It is not entirely uncommon for someone to get married outside of the Church, then to return to the practice of faith and only realize, later in life, that the marriage needs to be brought into the Church. Life is complicated and sometimes it takes us a long time to understand the meaning of our faith in relation to the rest of our lives. If that’s you, just give your pastor or a priest a call and schedule an appointment. If it’s a decent priest, he’ll understand that this is about making things right and not about wagging a finger or shaming anyone. If it’s an annulment that you seek, if the priest has a heart, he will realize that this is a sensitive place and will tread lightly and allow you to share at your comfort level. If it’s a documentary case that you need, the priest can begin the process with you.  
It might happen that you’ll find yourself wanting an annulment for a marriage that did take place in the Church and that followed the necessary requirements. This type of annulment is called a “formal case” and will take more time than the documentary case (sometimes well over a year). In the Diocese of Cleveland, formal cases are handled by a case specialist who is trained precisely to help a person through this process. My advice, when it comes to annulments – whether formal or documentary cases – is DO NOT READ BLOGS AND ARTICLES ONLINE, just schedule a visit with your priest. There are too many different stories online from too many different sources and sometimes things vary from diocese to diocese. Just meet with your priest to discuss the next step when you’re ready to make that next step. The formal annulment will lean into the history of one’s former marriage and ask questions regarding the time leading up to the vows, at the time of the vows, and the time following the vows. This process can be difficult, because, no doubt, something happened that caused the separation. Those questions are meant to reflect on the conditions mentioned above: free, faithful, total, fruitful, with an appropriate knowledge about the nature of marriage and the person to whom one is marrying. The case specialist (in the Diocese of Cleveland) will work with you, and together you will see if there was something at the time of vows that would have hampered those vows from truly enacting the Sacrament of Matrimony as envisioned by the Church and Christ. An annulment does not mean a relationship never took place; it means that something was lacking at some point in the vows that prevented a sacramental bond from taking place.  
The Church will always want to defend the marriage bond and hopes that couples can work through their difficulties together. We want to follow Jesus’ teaching. Annulments are not meant to be a “Catholic divorce,” but, rather, to take seriously the interpersonal nature of the Sacrament of Matrimony and those elements necessary in that relationship for the Sacrament to take place. If that seems like a lot of nuanced jargon, it’s because marriage is...complicated, especially when deep hurts are involved. As a priest, I do want people to reflect the glory of God in their marriage and to one another. That one flesh union, when lived in grace (sometimes a cruciform grace in our broken world) and forgiving charity, has the power to influence generations of Catholics and shape parish and local culture. Separation and divorce should never be entered into lightly; and, as a priest, I have yet to meet someone who has ever separated or divorced with a flippant and apathetic attitude. Although we want to uphold the bond of marriage, recognizing Jesus’ teaching about divorce, the Church also does not intend for people to remain in abusive or dangerous situations; and, sometimes separation, for a time, can help give some necessary space for a couple to work through their needs for deeper healing to happen. Although the Gospel calls us to forgive, forgiveness does not mean we place ourselves in harm’s way time and again. Each person has a right to protect themselves and their children. If you’ve been through a divorce, please know that this priest does love you and desires your healing. I realize that no one enters a marriage hoping for divorce, and that very few (like, none) separations and/or divorces “just happen” overnight. Yours is a complicated story that deserves reverence and respect. We want to uphold Jesus’ teachings about marriage considering Jesus’ teachings about service, ministry, and healing.  
If you’ve been divorced and hope to marry in the future, please do not wait until the engagement to speak with a priest, schedule a time now to begin whichever process needs to take place. Priests can only schedule a marriage between a man and woman if both parties are free to marry. If you’ve been married outside of the Church, married and divorced several times, etc or somewhere in between, and you’d like to ask about an annulment or about bringing your current marriage into the Church, schedule a time with your priest. There’s nothing to be ashamed of when someone is seeking to either bring their marriage into the Church or see whether they are free to marry in the Catholic Church. That’s not about shame or fear, it’s about striving to make things right and get set with Christ and his Church.  
Yes, Jesus does give us very serious statements about marriage and divorce in Mark 10. The annulment is about preserving the integrity of the marriage bond by grappling with what vows entail. It’s because marriage is no small thing that annulments can become serious and lengthy processes. If something is lacking in the vows or in the knowledge of the spouses or freedom of those entering marriage, then can we really say that a sacramental bond took place? That’s precisely what the diocesan tribunal investigates for a formal case. And the tribunal investigates this because marriage is a public sacrament in the church like the priestly promises that I made in Church, and that offers me both rights and responsibilities. We not only want to uphold Jesus’ teaching about divorce, but we also want to uphold Jesus' teaching about what marriage is and what it entails. Annulments are not a “Catholic divorce,” but they follow a legal divorce because – as stated above – marriage is a public act that involves the Church and broader society.  
If you’re struggling in your marriage, please know that many solid resources exist to help you and your spouse through a difficult season. If a divorce happens, know that the Church does love you and desires your healing. Again, if you’ve been divorced and desire to remarry (even if you’re not currently dating but only intend to), please contact your priest. And, if you’re currently married outside of the church, please contact your priest about bringing your marriage into the Church. 
May God bless you and may we all learn to cherish the Word of God, thank Jesus for his truth and for his mercy, and extend that mercy and truth to one another in charity.